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20 Temmuz 2022, 01:18
1
The following morning I woke to the sounds of Steven moving from room to room. The scent of stale cigarette smoke lingered throughout the apartment and suddenly it didn't seem so sexy and appealing. He didn't need to say anything, his expression said it all as he opened windows and sprayed air freshener.
"Are you ok?" I asked, still snuggled beneath the duvet with just my head poking out.
"Yeah, I just need to get rid of this smell before it stains everything," he sounded disappointed.
"Sorry." I wasn't actually, but I felt the moment called for me saying it.
"Don't be silly, you don't have anything to be sorry for," he stopped what he was doing, came, and sat beside me on the bed. "It was the hottest sex I've ever had. The feeling and churning inside me was so intense. I only wished the excitement hadn't brought it to an end so quickly."
Steven leaned down and kissed me softly on top of my forehead. I smiled and pulled on the duvet.
"I was so nervous at the dinner table last night," I told him, as I rolled onto my back and held the duvet high up my body to keep me warm. "I honestly didn't know if you were going to love it or freak out on me."
Steven chuckled. "I would have stopped you immediately if I didn't have a clue what you were doing."
"Did you seriously leave all those sites in your browser history for me to find them?" I smirked with a tilt of my head.
Steven sighed with an embarrassed smile as his cheeks turned a brighter shade of red. "Now is not the time to open up about it. Sorry, Beth."
"Hey, hey," I quickly sat up to reassure him, placing my left hand at the side of his head. As I rose from the bed the duvet fell away, exposing my breasts. With the bedroom window open I felt the cold and my nipples instantly stiffened. "It doesn't matter to me why. All the matters is that we are open with each other."
"And now you're teasing me with your tits out," he laughed, cupping my left breast in his right hand."
"They're your tits if you want them?" I winked, pulling his head forwards to kiss him.
Our gentle, loving, morning embrace quickly turned passionate and arousing. Steven was dressed in his shorts, vest and trainers, ready for a morning jog. I reached for his cock through his shorts and giggled between kisses at how hard he was for me. He threw back the duvet and I shrieked at the total loss of warmth as my naked lower half was also exposed to the cold room.
"Can't you close that window? It's bloody freezing in here now!" I moaned but was also smiling.
"I'll warm you up," he said, quickly stripping out of his jogging kit and jumping between my legs with his cock ready for action. "Not all of you is cold," he smirked, rubbing my outer lips and then easing a finger between them.
"Uhhhhhh ..." I gasped as his digit slid straight between my soft folds and submerged itself in my juice. "Yes ... uhhhhhh yes!" I gasped again when he curled his finger upwards and started rubbing the roof of my pussy.
"Mmmmmm, are you craving my cock this morning?" he teased, removing his finger and slapping his bellend repeatedly against my clit.
"Don't tease me, just put it in. I need you to fuck me!" I panted and began flicking my hips.
"Tell me Beth, are you craving this?" he demanded and slapped his cock harder.
"Yes!" I'm craving your cock!" I exclaimed.
"Are you craving anything else?" he lowered his voice.
Oblivious, I closed my eyes and waited to feel that wonderful sensation of his cock sliding deep inside my aching pussy. "I'm craving your cock and your hot cum! Now fuck me!"
Steven wasn't finished teasing me. In a soft, almost shy voice, he asked me if I was craving a morning cigarette as he spread my lips with just the tip of his cock. He rubbed up and down, soaking the sensitive bulbous head in my vaginal fluid. We were both panting and I seriously needed his cock to penetrate and then fuck me until I exploded.
"You want me to smoke again?" I checked with him.
"I want to know if you're craving one?" His face was tense with his cock still rubbing up and down the length of my outer lips.
I smiled and leaned over to open the top bedside drawer. "Yes, I really need my morning cigarette to go with my morning cock," I spoke softly.
"Oh fuck," he muttered under his breath.
"Be a good boy and hold this," I smiled and handed him the ashtray.
Steven continued teasing us both with his cock while I opened my packet of Richmond Superslims and pulled out a long thin, all-white cigarette. "Mmmmmm," I moaned playfully, then put the packet down and picked up the lighter.
"You look so hot and slutty!" Steven hissed, watching me place the filter at my mouth and press the lighter into action. "Take a drag as I push into you," he said.
"Uhhhhhhhhh ..." I gasped with my lips firmly wrapped around the filter and drawing on the cigarette. The flame burned the tip in time with my pussy lips drawing on Stevens cock as he finally entered me. "Fuuuuuuck!" I gasped again, right before inhaling the thick ball of escort bursa (https://www.sokkan.net) smoke into my lungs.
Steven took his time, very slowly sliding in and out of me. I was so wet and he was so hard it felt like the most natural thing in the world. I opened my eyes and exhaled a thick plume of smoke up at the bedroom ceiling. I looked at Steven and then deep into his eyes. He looked very happy, smiling down at me as he slowly fucked my pussy and caressed my breasts with his right hand, and whilst managing to balance the ashtray in his left. I didn't feel I was being dominant, but it did feel sexy being fucked like that whilst having a cigarette.
I took another deep drag and tapped the ash into the tray as I exhaled. I closed my eyes and took yet another deep drag as Steven raised himself slightly higher to push his cock deeper inside me. It felt so good I had no choice but to close my eyes and selfishly forget about him. I told him not to stop until he had satisfied me with an orgasm. My mind focussed on the smoke filling my lungs and the throbbing cock filling my pussy, until I exhaled the final drag and climaxed. It also proved to be the tipping point for Steven as his climax immediately followed mine, where he ejaculated his warm thick seed deep into my womb. He would later explain how hot I looked languidly smoking while I moaned on his cock until I convulsed and shrieked. I revelled at how pleased he was and giggled.
2
Later that afternoon Steven was sat on the sofa watching the Sunday football when I entered the room dressed for a couple of drinks with some friends. I was wearing a pair of jeans, boots, and a low-cut black top with my long dark brown hair washed and curled at the ends.
"Are you planning on being home late?" he asked.
"I'm meeting Jess and Hayley at the new bar in town. It's more of a catch up than a piss up, so I won't be having more than one or two drinks. I'll be home by nine, nine-thirty the latest," I shrugged.
"That's cool, are Jess and Hayley smokers?" he smiled curiously.
I chuckled as I stood in the lounge mirror and applied some mascara and lip-gloss. I wasn't being playful or sexy, I was simply finishing off getting ready while I waited for my taxi to arrive. But Steven was still watching me. "Yes," I replied, "Jess smokes and Hayley smokes socially when she's having a drink."
"What about you?" he asked with raised eyebrows, his smile having turned into a big grin.
"What about me?" I teased, finishing my make-up and putting my lip-gloss and mascara inside me handbag."
"Will you be smoking to?" he croaked, suddenly losing some of his confidence.
"I thought we agreed that smoking was just for us and I wouldn't go back to being a regular smoker?"
"Sorry, I keep getting carried away. It's just so hot now it's out in the open between us," he murmured, definitely losing confidence now.
"We need to discuss this fetish Steven," I said, sitting beside him on the sofa. "We need boundaries or I risk turning back into a regular smoker, and the apartment turning into some kind of smoking room."
"You're right," he nodded, looking sheepishly at his hands clasped together between his legs. "This could get out of hand if we're not careful."
"Answer me honestly, ok?" I spoke softly and looked openly into his eyes.
"I promise," he raised his head to meet my gaze.
"Do you want me to be your smoking slut, or do you want me to be your smoking mistress?"
"Fuck!" he blurted out in shock.
I had watched enough video links in his internet browser history to understand he enjoyed watching a mixture of both. As I explained in chapter one, Steven had been watching dominatrix smoking videos and casual smoking videos. But I was yet to understand what it was that turned him on about it all.
"I understand this must be difficult for you to share all the details about what it is you want from this smoking fetish. So, why don't I go out and have a couple of drinks with the girls and then when I get home later we can discuss it properly. No smoking, just talk and come to a mutual understanding."
"I totally agree with you. Go and enjoy your evening and we can talk when you get back," he seemed to relax again.
Suddenly the taxi beeped its horn outside and it was time for me to leave. I kissed Steven goodbye and left my cigarettes at home.
"Thanks for being so understanding," he said. "I know a lot of women would have freaked out and thought of me as a weirdo."
"No they wouldn't have," I reassured him. "We can't help what turns us on. It's good to understand what excites us both."
3
When I met up with Jess and Hayley I instantly regretted leaving my cigarettes at home. It was of course the right decision, but when I stepped out of the taxi to find them waiting for me outside the bar with cigarettes alight, I felt murmurs of nicotine cravings.
As the late afternoon turned into the early evening the three of us caught up on all the latest gossip. Our two planned drinks turned into four and we were tipsy. The smoking ban was on the horizon görükle escort (https://www.sokkan.net/dizin/gorukle-escort/) so people were still smoking indoors. For the first time in a long time I actually longed to be a smoker again. I knew deep down I didn't really want that, but my recent experiences with Steven was seriously testing my resolve as I sat with Jess and Hayley smoking at the table.
Jess was smoking heavily as she worked her way through half a packet of Marlboro Lights, while Hayley smoked much less of her packet of Silk Cut. They appeared so natural lighting up without a moment's hesitation. They didn't even pause during our conversation, apart for the first lighting and taking a drag. I would watch them and glance at their respective packets on the table. As more and more alcohol entered my bloodstream the desire to join them intensified. How I managed to get through those three hours without breaking and asking for a cigarette I'll never know.
I returned home around 9pm and took complete control. I went into the kitchen and grabbed two bottles of beer from the fridge. Steven welcomed me with a hug and a kiss before we sat down on the sofa to resume our earlier conversation, and more.
"Did you smoke?" he seemed excited.
"No," I disappointed him, "but I wanted to."
"Ok, so what stopped you?"
"We need to have this conversation first," I told him. "I want you to relax and tell me why you find smoking such a turn on I'm not going to judge you. I think we both agree we are past that point," I giggled.
Steven smiled and relaxed into the sofa. "I think you're owed at least that much," he said.
"Like I said earlier, we need to set boundaries, and the only way we can do that is for us both to understand your fetish and work something out."
Steven took a big swig from his bottle and sighed a big breath in preparation for what he was about to divulge.
"I'm not sure I truly understand it," he began before pausing and appearing to reflect. "I've never particularly enjoyed the smell, but attractive women who smoke have always turned me on."
"Just attractive women?" I wondered.
"Yeah," he shrugged. "Sorry if that sounds shallow, but the sight of an attractive woman smoking has always aroused me. I even researched it when I became addicted to jacking off over images and videos of women smoking. They only thing I was certain of was they had to be attractive or it didn't do anything for me."
"But you always encouraged me to quit, and you never gave me the impression that I turned you on when I smoked."
"I know," he paused once more and took another swig of beer. "I don't want to encourage anybody, especially my girlfriend to smoke. Besides, as soon as I shoot my load I instantly regret it and feel ashamed. I feel weird and embarrassed in my own skin."
I felt sympathy and touched his leg. I couldn't imagine what it feels like for somebody to satisfy a sexual desire only to regret it afterwards. "Did the research give you any answers?"
Steven shrugged. "Plenty of possible answers but nothing I could ever put my finger on."
"Ok, when did you first notice that smoking turned you on?"
"I guess it would have been discreetly watching the attractive girls in high school. They would congregate near the woods during break times to smoke. The teachers knew, but the woods were on the school boundary so they never seemed to interfere. They would also smoke to and from school. The girls were hot and sexy anyway, but when they smoked they looked even sexier."
"How many attractive girls are you talking about?"
"In high school there was one particular girl called Sara. She was a stunning redhead with big tits and all the boys loved her. She was top of her classes and you had to have serious confidence to get anywhere near her. Which I didn't have of course."
"You've always been confident since I've known you."
"Not back in high school I wasn't. Anyway, for me she was not the kind of girl I thought would ever be a smoker. It made her seem rebellious. It showed me that not all hot girls who appeared good were actually good. Something inside me loved the fact she had this bad side. It made me fantasise about her sexually. At the time I just thought the cigarette was an accessory during my fantasises involving her."
"I know when I first tried it with my friends we all felt naughty and that was exciting. Doing something we knew we shouldn't." I tried to connect with him. "So this Sara made you realise smoking turned you on?"
"Actually, now I think about it, it started with hot women smoking in movies. I think I was in denial until I started watching Sara."
"Any particular movie scenes that you remember?"
"There are so many, but off the top of my head I loved Angelina Jolie smoking in Girl, Interrupted. Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction. I didn't like the movie much but the woman in Grease with John Travolta."
"Olivia Newton John as Sandy?"
"Yeah her. All prim and proper until the end when she turns up in that leather outfit, smoking a cigarette like a bad-ass bursa escort bayan (https://www.sokkan.net/dizin/bursa-escort-bayan/) chick. But my favourite has to be Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct, although that's probably more down to the fact she flashes her pussy when she uncrosses her legs and then crosses them again."
We both laughed which brought a sense of ease into the conversation.
"Don't get embarrassed, but did you always get off over those scenes?" I continued to probe.
"Many times, until I progressed to searching smoking videos online. That's when I learnt I had a smoking fetish and it was very common. It didn't normalise it for me though. I still felt weird and ashamed as soon as I came."
"Have you ever smoked?"
"I bought a packet once and tried it. Nearly threw up everywhere, it was disgusting."
I laughed remembering the first time with my friends, ironically in the woods near to where I grew up. My friends and I also coughed and nearly spewed. I did actually vow to never smoke again.
"So you've never tried it since?" I pressed him.
"No, I've never wanted to and nor will I ever want to. It's definitely a visual thing."
"What do you think about in those moments when you're watching a woman smoke?"
"It varies," he mused. "Professional women hit a chord with me the most. But I don't want anybody but you Beth," he quickly moved to reassure me.
"It's fine, we all find other people attractive. Just be as open and as honest as possible."
Steven shifted on the sofa and finished his beer. I hadn't touched a drop of mine. I was glued to my seat holding the bottle and listening intently.
"Professional women appear intelligent, smart and sexy in their business skirts, blouses, dresses or whatever. But when they sit or stand outside smoking on a break they just ignite those same feelings that Sara did. Don't get me wrong, I no longer fantasise about her. I imagine the attractive smoking woman doing the exact same things we did this morning and last night."
"Does the brand of cigarette matter to you?"
"It didn't until you pulled out an all-white cigarette. My cock went solid when your lipstick stained the filter."
"Do you think it's mainly an oral fixation then?"
"That's definitely an element of it. The way she delicately holds the cigarette and wraps her lips around the filter, just like you did. The enjoyment her face displays as she draws on the cigarette and then inhales the smoke. Then finally the satisfaction she exudes when she exhales. Again, just like you did last night. But you also did that for me, and that was the most excited I had ever felt about smoking in my life."
I beamed with pride. "What else do you think about when you witness this act of smoking by an attractive woman, or is it simply sexual because it's rebellious and oral?"
"I like that she's addicted to something so bad. The idea that she probably wishes she could quit but she can't, that's also strangely arousing to me."
"So rebellious, oral fixation, attractive and sexy, and ... just trying to confirm my understanding here ... she's possibly become a slave to smoking cigarettes?"
"Yeah, although I'd say hopelessly addicted rather than a slave. She enjoys it so much she can't stop doing it."
"Interesting," it was mine turn to muse. "I can see how that links with sex."
"But it's weird and that's why I feel embarrassed within myself when I cum over the fantasy."
"Please stop feeling guilty about it," I touched his leg again. "I don't think you're a weirdo or a freak. When I found your internet history I was confused, but also curious to understand it. I think being an ex-smoker helped me."
"Did you ever feel sexy when you smoked? I mean before you discovered all this about me?" he asked.
I finally took a mouthful from the bottle and then another as I considered my answer. "It's never turned me on like it does you, but there is a level of excitement attached to it, particularly when I started."
"Care to elaborate?"
"Like many people who smoke, I started out of curiosity. I wasn't consciously aware that it had anything to do with being rebellious, cool, or trying to fit in with my friends who smoked. I didn't feel I needed to do any of that. There was no peer pressure either. The decision to try a cigarette for the first time was solely mine, the decision to take up the habit, however, was a little out of my control as I naturally and inevitably became addicted to a point where willpower alone wasn't going to get me to stop. But I wasn't thinking about the health implications, because like all teens, I thought I had time on my side to quit. So very similar to what you have just explained, the woman wanting to quit but it's too enjoyable."
"Nailed on if you ask me," he smiled pleasingly. "So what do you think made you want to try it then?"
"When I look back now I guess it probably was about being rebellious and cool. I'm not just saying that because it fits in with what you've said, but it was secretive when I first tried it. Hiding in the woods full of anticipation that I was going to smoke a cigarette for the first time. But I also looked up to female celebrities, especially the ones who smoked. It made them seem normal like the rest of us. I then became addicted and started hiding my habit, even from my friends."
The following morning I woke to the sounds of Steven moving from room to room. The scent of stale cigarette smoke lingered throughout the apartment and suddenly it didn't seem so sexy and appealing. He didn't need to say anything, his expression said it all as he opened windows and sprayed air freshener.
"Are you ok?" I asked, still snuggled beneath the duvet with just my head poking out.
"Yeah, I just need to get rid of this smell before it stains everything," he sounded disappointed.
"Sorry." I wasn't actually, but I felt the moment called for me saying it.
"Don't be silly, you don't have anything to be sorry for," he stopped what he was doing, came, and sat beside me on the bed. "It was the hottest sex I've ever had. The feeling and churning inside me was so intense. I only wished the excitement hadn't brought it to an end so quickly."
Steven leaned down and kissed me softly on top of my forehead. I smiled and pulled on the duvet.
"I was so nervous at the dinner table last night," I told him, as I rolled onto my back and held the duvet high up my body to keep me warm. "I honestly didn't know if you were going to love it or freak out on me."
Steven chuckled. "I would have stopped you immediately if I didn't have a clue what you were doing."
"Did you seriously leave all those sites in your browser history for me to find them?" I smirked with a tilt of my head.
Steven sighed with an embarrassed smile as his cheeks turned a brighter shade of red. "Now is not the time to open up about it. Sorry, Beth."
"Hey, hey," I quickly sat up to reassure him, placing my left hand at the side of his head. As I rose from the bed the duvet fell away, exposing my breasts. With the bedroom window open I felt the cold and my nipples instantly stiffened. "It doesn't matter to me why. All the matters is that we are open with each other."
"And now you're teasing me with your tits out," he laughed, cupping my left breast in his right hand."
"They're your tits if you want them?" I winked, pulling his head forwards to kiss him.
Our gentle, loving, morning embrace quickly turned passionate and arousing. Steven was dressed in his shorts, vest and trainers, ready for a morning jog. I reached for his cock through his shorts and giggled between kisses at how hard he was for me. He threw back the duvet and I shrieked at the total loss of warmth as my naked lower half was also exposed to the cold room.
"Can't you close that window? It's bloody freezing in here now!" I moaned but was also smiling.
"I'll warm you up," he said, quickly stripping out of his jogging kit and jumping between my legs with his cock ready for action. "Not all of you is cold," he smirked, rubbing my outer lips and then easing a finger between them.
"Uhhhhhh ..." I gasped as his digit slid straight between my soft folds and submerged itself in my juice. "Yes ... uhhhhhh yes!" I gasped again when he curled his finger upwards and started rubbing the roof of my pussy.
"Mmmmmm, are you craving my cock this morning?" he teased, removing his finger and slapping his bellend repeatedly against my clit.
"Don't tease me, just put it in. I need you to fuck me!" I panted and began flicking my hips.
"Tell me Beth, are you craving this?" he demanded and slapped his cock harder.
"Yes!" I'm craving your cock!" I exclaimed.
"Are you craving anything else?" he lowered his voice.
Oblivious, I closed my eyes and waited to feel that wonderful sensation of his cock sliding deep inside my aching pussy. "I'm craving your cock and your hot cum! Now fuck me!"
Steven wasn't finished teasing me. In a soft, almost shy voice, he asked me if I was craving a morning cigarette as he spread my lips with just the tip of his cock. He rubbed up and down, soaking the sensitive bulbous head in my vaginal fluid. We were both panting and I seriously needed his cock to penetrate and then fuck me until I exploded.
"You want me to smoke again?" I checked with him.
"I want to know if you're craving one?" His face was tense with his cock still rubbing up and down the length of my outer lips.
I smiled and leaned over to open the top bedside drawer. "Yes, I really need my morning cigarette to go with my morning cock," I spoke softly.
"Oh fuck," he muttered under his breath.
"Be a good boy and hold this," I smiled and handed him the ashtray.
Steven continued teasing us both with his cock while I opened my packet of Richmond Superslims and pulled out a long thin, all-white cigarette. "Mmmmmm," I moaned playfully, then put the packet down and picked up the lighter.
"You look so hot and slutty!" Steven hissed, watching me place the filter at my mouth and press the lighter into action. "Take a drag as I push into you," he said.
"Uhhhhhhhhh ..." I gasped with my lips firmly wrapped around the filter and drawing on the cigarette. The flame burned the tip in time with my pussy lips drawing on Stevens cock as he finally entered me. "Fuuuuuuck!" I gasped again, right before inhaling the thick ball of escort bursa (https://www.sokkan.net) smoke into my lungs.
Steven took his time, very slowly sliding in and out of me. I was so wet and he was so hard it felt like the most natural thing in the world. I opened my eyes and exhaled a thick plume of smoke up at the bedroom ceiling. I looked at Steven and then deep into his eyes. He looked very happy, smiling down at me as he slowly fucked my pussy and caressed my breasts with his right hand, and whilst managing to balance the ashtray in his left. I didn't feel I was being dominant, but it did feel sexy being fucked like that whilst having a cigarette.
I took another deep drag and tapped the ash into the tray as I exhaled. I closed my eyes and took yet another deep drag as Steven raised himself slightly higher to push his cock deeper inside me. It felt so good I had no choice but to close my eyes and selfishly forget about him. I told him not to stop until he had satisfied me with an orgasm. My mind focussed on the smoke filling my lungs and the throbbing cock filling my pussy, until I exhaled the final drag and climaxed. It also proved to be the tipping point for Steven as his climax immediately followed mine, where he ejaculated his warm thick seed deep into my womb. He would later explain how hot I looked languidly smoking while I moaned on his cock until I convulsed and shrieked. I revelled at how pleased he was and giggled.
2
Later that afternoon Steven was sat on the sofa watching the Sunday football when I entered the room dressed for a couple of drinks with some friends. I was wearing a pair of jeans, boots, and a low-cut black top with my long dark brown hair washed and curled at the ends.
"Are you planning on being home late?" he asked.
"I'm meeting Jess and Hayley at the new bar in town. It's more of a catch up than a piss up, so I won't be having more than one or two drinks. I'll be home by nine, nine-thirty the latest," I shrugged.
"That's cool, are Jess and Hayley smokers?" he smiled curiously.
I chuckled as I stood in the lounge mirror and applied some mascara and lip-gloss. I wasn't being playful or sexy, I was simply finishing off getting ready while I waited for my taxi to arrive. But Steven was still watching me. "Yes," I replied, "Jess smokes and Hayley smokes socially when she's having a drink."
"What about you?" he asked with raised eyebrows, his smile having turned into a big grin.
"What about me?" I teased, finishing my make-up and putting my lip-gloss and mascara inside me handbag."
"Will you be smoking to?" he croaked, suddenly losing some of his confidence.
"I thought we agreed that smoking was just for us and I wouldn't go back to being a regular smoker?"
"Sorry, I keep getting carried away. It's just so hot now it's out in the open between us," he murmured, definitely losing confidence now.
"We need to discuss this fetish Steven," I said, sitting beside him on the sofa. "We need boundaries or I risk turning back into a regular smoker, and the apartment turning into some kind of smoking room."
"You're right," he nodded, looking sheepishly at his hands clasped together between his legs. "This could get out of hand if we're not careful."
"Answer me honestly, ok?" I spoke softly and looked openly into his eyes.
"I promise," he raised his head to meet my gaze.
"Do you want me to be your smoking slut, or do you want me to be your smoking mistress?"
"Fuck!" he blurted out in shock.
I had watched enough video links in his internet browser history to understand he enjoyed watching a mixture of both. As I explained in chapter one, Steven had been watching dominatrix smoking videos and casual smoking videos. But I was yet to understand what it was that turned him on about it all.
"I understand this must be difficult for you to share all the details about what it is you want from this smoking fetish. So, why don't I go out and have a couple of drinks with the girls and then when I get home later we can discuss it properly. No smoking, just talk and come to a mutual understanding."
"I totally agree with you. Go and enjoy your evening and we can talk when you get back," he seemed to relax again.
Suddenly the taxi beeped its horn outside and it was time for me to leave. I kissed Steven goodbye and left my cigarettes at home.
"Thanks for being so understanding," he said. "I know a lot of women would have freaked out and thought of me as a weirdo."
"No they wouldn't have," I reassured him. "We can't help what turns us on. It's good to understand what excites us both."
3
When I met up with Jess and Hayley I instantly regretted leaving my cigarettes at home. It was of course the right decision, but when I stepped out of the taxi to find them waiting for me outside the bar with cigarettes alight, I felt murmurs of nicotine cravings.
As the late afternoon turned into the early evening the three of us caught up on all the latest gossip. Our two planned drinks turned into four and we were tipsy. The smoking ban was on the horizon görükle escort (https://www.sokkan.net/dizin/gorukle-escort/) so people were still smoking indoors. For the first time in a long time I actually longed to be a smoker again. I knew deep down I didn't really want that, but my recent experiences with Steven was seriously testing my resolve as I sat with Jess and Hayley smoking at the table.
Jess was smoking heavily as she worked her way through half a packet of Marlboro Lights, while Hayley smoked much less of her packet of Silk Cut. They appeared so natural lighting up without a moment's hesitation. They didn't even pause during our conversation, apart for the first lighting and taking a drag. I would watch them and glance at their respective packets on the table. As more and more alcohol entered my bloodstream the desire to join them intensified. How I managed to get through those three hours without breaking and asking for a cigarette I'll never know.
I returned home around 9pm and took complete control. I went into the kitchen and grabbed two bottles of beer from the fridge. Steven welcomed me with a hug and a kiss before we sat down on the sofa to resume our earlier conversation, and more.
"Did you smoke?" he seemed excited.
"No," I disappointed him, "but I wanted to."
"Ok, so what stopped you?"
"We need to have this conversation first," I told him. "I want you to relax and tell me why you find smoking such a turn on I'm not going to judge you. I think we both agree we are past that point," I giggled.
Steven smiled and relaxed into the sofa. "I think you're owed at least that much," he said.
"Like I said earlier, we need to set boundaries, and the only way we can do that is for us both to understand your fetish and work something out."
Steven took a big swig from his bottle and sighed a big breath in preparation for what he was about to divulge.
"I'm not sure I truly understand it," he began before pausing and appearing to reflect. "I've never particularly enjoyed the smell, but attractive women who smoke have always turned me on."
"Just attractive women?" I wondered.
"Yeah," he shrugged. "Sorry if that sounds shallow, but the sight of an attractive woman smoking has always aroused me. I even researched it when I became addicted to jacking off over images and videos of women smoking. They only thing I was certain of was they had to be attractive or it didn't do anything for me."
"But you always encouraged me to quit, and you never gave me the impression that I turned you on when I smoked."
"I know," he paused once more and took another swig of beer. "I don't want to encourage anybody, especially my girlfriend to smoke. Besides, as soon as I shoot my load I instantly regret it and feel ashamed. I feel weird and embarrassed in my own skin."
I felt sympathy and touched his leg. I couldn't imagine what it feels like for somebody to satisfy a sexual desire only to regret it afterwards. "Did the research give you any answers?"
Steven shrugged. "Plenty of possible answers but nothing I could ever put my finger on."
"Ok, when did you first notice that smoking turned you on?"
"I guess it would have been discreetly watching the attractive girls in high school. They would congregate near the woods during break times to smoke. The teachers knew, but the woods were on the school boundary so they never seemed to interfere. They would also smoke to and from school. The girls were hot and sexy anyway, but when they smoked they looked even sexier."
"How many attractive girls are you talking about?"
"In high school there was one particular girl called Sara. She was a stunning redhead with big tits and all the boys loved her. She was top of her classes and you had to have serious confidence to get anywhere near her. Which I didn't have of course."
"You've always been confident since I've known you."
"Not back in high school I wasn't. Anyway, for me she was not the kind of girl I thought would ever be a smoker. It made her seem rebellious. It showed me that not all hot girls who appeared good were actually good. Something inside me loved the fact she had this bad side. It made me fantasise about her sexually. At the time I just thought the cigarette was an accessory during my fantasises involving her."
"I know when I first tried it with my friends we all felt naughty and that was exciting. Doing something we knew we shouldn't." I tried to connect with him. "So this Sara made you realise smoking turned you on?"
"Actually, now I think about it, it started with hot women smoking in movies. I think I was in denial until I started watching Sara."
"Any particular movie scenes that you remember?"
"There are so many, but off the top of my head I loved Angelina Jolie smoking in Girl, Interrupted. Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction. I didn't like the movie much but the woman in Grease with John Travolta."
"Olivia Newton John as Sandy?"
"Yeah her. All prim and proper until the end when she turns up in that leather outfit, smoking a cigarette like a bad-ass bursa escort bayan (https://www.sokkan.net/dizin/bursa-escort-bayan/) chick. But my favourite has to be Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct, although that's probably more down to the fact she flashes her pussy when she uncrosses her legs and then crosses them again."
We both laughed which brought a sense of ease into the conversation.
"Don't get embarrassed, but did you always get off over those scenes?" I continued to probe.
"Many times, until I progressed to searching smoking videos online. That's when I learnt I had a smoking fetish and it was very common. It didn't normalise it for me though. I still felt weird and ashamed as soon as I came."
"Have you ever smoked?"
"I bought a packet once and tried it. Nearly threw up everywhere, it was disgusting."
I laughed remembering the first time with my friends, ironically in the woods near to where I grew up. My friends and I also coughed and nearly spewed. I did actually vow to never smoke again.
"So you've never tried it since?" I pressed him.
"No, I've never wanted to and nor will I ever want to. It's definitely a visual thing."
"What do you think about in those moments when you're watching a woman smoke?"
"It varies," he mused. "Professional women hit a chord with me the most. But I don't want anybody but you Beth," he quickly moved to reassure me.
"It's fine, we all find other people attractive. Just be as open and as honest as possible."
Steven shifted on the sofa and finished his beer. I hadn't touched a drop of mine. I was glued to my seat holding the bottle and listening intently.
"Professional women appear intelligent, smart and sexy in their business skirts, blouses, dresses or whatever. But when they sit or stand outside smoking on a break they just ignite those same feelings that Sara did. Don't get me wrong, I no longer fantasise about her. I imagine the attractive smoking woman doing the exact same things we did this morning and last night."
"Does the brand of cigarette matter to you?"
"It didn't until you pulled out an all-white cigarette. My cock went solid when your lipstick stained the filter."
"Do you think it's mainly an oral fixation then?"
"That's definitely an element of it. The way she delicately holds the cigarette and wraps her lips around the filter, just like you did. The enjoyment her face displays as she draws on the cigarette and then inhales the smoke. Then finally the satisfaction she exudes when she exhales. Again, just like you did last night. But you also did that for me, and that was the most excited I had ever felt about smoking in my life."
I beamed with pride. "What else do you think about when you witness this act of smoking by an attractive woman, or is it simply sexual because it's rebellious and oral?"
"I like that she's addicted to something so bad. The idea that she probably wishes she could quit but she can't, that's also strangely arousing to me."
"So rebellious, oral fixation, attractive and sexy, and ... just trying to confirm my understanding here ... she's possibly become a slave to smoking cigarettes?"
"Yeah, although I'd say hopelessly addicted rather than a slave. She enjoys it so much she can't stop doing it."
"Interesting," it was mine turn to muse. "I can see how that links with sex."
"But it's weird and that's why I feel embarrassed within myself when I cum over the fantasy."
"Please stop feeling guilty about it," I touched his leg again. "I don't think you're a weirdo or a freak. When I found your internet history I was confused, but also curious to understand it. I think being an ex-smoker helped me."
"Did you ever feel sexy when you smoked? I mean before you discovered all this about me?" he asked.
I finally took a mouthful from the bottle and then another as I considered my answer. "It's never turned me on like it does you, but there is a level of excitement attached to it, particularly when I started."
"Care to elaborate?"
"Like many people who smoke, I started out of curiosity. I wasn't consciously aware that it had anything to do with being rebellious, cool, or trying to fit in with my friends who smoked. I didn't feel I needed to do any of that. There was no peer pressure either. The decision to try a cigarette for the first time was solely mine, the decision to take up the habit, however, was a little out of my control as I naturally and inevitably became addicted to a point where willpower alone wasn't going to get me to stop. But I wasn't thinking about the health implications, because like all teens, I thought I had time on my side to quit. So very similar to what you have just explained, the woman wanting to quit but it's too enjoyable."
"Nailed on if you ask me," he smiled pleasingly. "So what do you think made you want to try it then?"
"When I look back now I guess it probably was about being rebellious and cool. I'm not just saying that because it fits in with what you've said, but it was secretive when I first tried it. Hiding in the woods full of anticipation that I was going to smoke a cigarette for the first time. But I also looked up to female celebrities, especially the ones who smoked. It made them seem normal like the rest of us. I then became addicted and started hiding my habit, even from my friends."